are you so shy because you have an std?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
