remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize