The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
