Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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