I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
