I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
My Sexting was not on an AP level
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
