if only i could text you this smell
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I think my nap took me to another dimension
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
