If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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