smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
