You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
God, you're like boner-b-gone
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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