He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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