Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
