He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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