If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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