Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
he puts the penis in happiness.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Randomize
