Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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