Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
