I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
