brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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