If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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