is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
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