shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize
