she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
