Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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