but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
