ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
