I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
