I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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