you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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