bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Sorry about my life...
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
