So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Randomize
