you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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