How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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