Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
