it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Randomize
