Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Randomize
