On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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