Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
