Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
