Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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