i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
