she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
