We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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