meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
