if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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