Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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