Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
