If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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