hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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