wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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